I have been living here for just over two weeks now. I couldn't tell you where that time has gone, I am after all in the city that never sleeps. The fast paced atmosphere is suited to me, and the days seem very short. With that said, on the other hand it feels like I have always been here, as if I have lived here for years. I feel so far away from my life in London and perhaps I've not been here long but I haven't got a lick of homesickness. Considering my love for London I thought I would have some sort of longing for home comfort, but I seem to have adapted so well here and fallen in love with this city that those feelings aren't present.
Everyone seems to be a creative here, especially in Brooklyn. It reminds me of London in many ways except everyone seems to be hustling harder here. I feel like the drive to create and make it is much stronger and apparent. I meet people and talk about their jobs and their goals and I watch how their eyes widen as they tell me their story of their journey here. It's an amazing hub of opportunity and I'm thriving in it.
I've found myself exploring more of Brooklyn itself than Manhattan, I haven't done much of the tourist stuff other than the ground zero memorials which were both heart-breaking and beautiful at the same time. Yesterday I was shown The Highline - an old railroad that used to run through Manhattan and had been converted into a garden walkway. Of course I intend on getting around to the museums, but my favourite experiences so far have been the local bars and events around my area. I found myself at a tiki disco in Bushwick the other day which I can only describe as a merge of Shoreditch and Coachella combined.
Last night however, I went to my new friend Anna's place where she was having friends over for drinks on her rooftop. I sat there drinking wine and listening to the devil makes 3 with the most tremendous view of the entire of Manhattan in front of me. I watched the cars sweeping in and out of the city over the bridges, and felt overwhelmed with emotion. This was real. This was happening, and I had made this happen for myself. I couldn't feel as free as I did at that very moment. It is certainly a high I will never forget.
I've spent my day emailing and getting in contact with people here. My shoot in Philadelphia last week went so well and it still amazes me that I am able to continue my ambition out here. A friend I had made at a crab shack in Redhook at the beginning of my stay here had briefly mentioned getting me in touch with the owner of Nylon magazine, and after hitting her up today and being linked into an email with said person, I think I will be working with them very soon. She loved my portfolio and said she was glad I had reached out to her. I cannot express what a great feeling that is.
I'm constantly surprising myself with how far I can push my comfort zone. I've signed up to an app called meet up - where you can join groups and find stuff to do all over the city. I've joined a bootcamp group (gulp) and I'm going to a vegan talk next week. There are so many opportunities to engage with and meet people here. I want to make the most of that.
Until next time,
G x
Wednesday 15 June 2016
Tuesday 7 June 2016
New York, New York
I had the idea last summer. It crept into my brain one night after spending a couple of weeks in Los Angeles and realising I crave the sun on my skin and but also the fast pace of my home city. It was just an idea. I booked flights in November last year. An impulse decision and fuelled by the spontaneity of it all. It probably wouldn't happen though, and what's £350 wasted anyway? I started telling people pretty soon after that, and when you tell people you have to do it. There's no point in saying you're going to do something unless you can carry out the intention. I found a place to stay and paid my rent up front, and even still at that point, something in my head was telling me it still wasn't real, and then all of a sudden I'm at JFK New York airport and it hits me that I'm about to spend the next three months living here. I actually did it.
Some people back home didn't get why I was leaving for so long, "but what are you going to do Gemma?" Three months is a long time. I've had a drive in me for as long as I can remember and I like to think it's what has fuelled my career and ambition. I knew I could make contacts out here. But predominantly I wanted to have a living experience. After finally feeling settled in London after over two years and feeling in the best possible place with life and work, it was time to yank myself out of my comfort zone and take it one step bigger. So this is my summer to meet as many people as possible and find as much beauty in this city as possible. If I like it, I'm going to self fund an 0-1 visa and hopefully move and work here in the long run.
I've been here for 5 days and I couldn't even imagine the things I have done since I got here. I thought as I struggled with London at the start, that I'd feel a bit out of depth here. However, my first day here I was asked to shoot in Philadelphia the following week, I ended up dog sitting for Robert Pattinson from twilight, drank in biker bars and played "dare Jenga" with a bunch of random people - resulting in me having to lunge twice around the bar and repeatedly doing the chicken dance. I've walked for miles into Manhattan and around Brooklyn, letting the 30 degree heat and sun dance on my skin and fill me with what can I only describe as complete and utter contentment.
This is the absolute best thing I have ever done. I think about my life right now and my stomach flips and it's an overwhelming feeling of joy. All I can do is share my experience and hope that I can influence people to go out and do things they usually wouldn't. Take a risk and don't worry about the negative, because if I had pursued only the thoughts of what could have gone wrong I would have never found myself here and wouldn't be giving myself the chances and opportunities I have driven myself for. I genuinely think this is the happiest I have ever been in my life, and as a past sufferer of depression, boy I can't tell you how great that is.
Forever the most cheesiest.
G x
Some people back home didn't get why I was leaving for so long, "but what are you going to do Gemma?" Three months is a long time. I've had a drive in me for as long as I can remember and I like to think it's what has fuelled my career and ambition. I knew I could make contacts out here. But predominantly I wanted to have a living experience. After finally feeling settled in London after over two years and feeling in the best possible place with life and work, it was time to yank myself out of my comfort zone and take it one step bigger. So this is my summer to meet as many people as possible and find as much beauty in this city as possible. If I like it, I'm going to self fund an 0-1 visa and hopefully move and work here in the long run.
I've been here for 5 days and I couldn't even imagine the things I have done since I got here. I thought as I struggled with London at the start, that I'd feel a bit out of depth here. However, my first day here I was asked to shoot in Philadelphia the following week, I ended up dog sitting for Robert Pattinson from twilight, drank in biker bars and played "dare Jenga" with a bunch of random people - resulting in me having to lunge twice around the bar and repeatedly doing the chicken dance. I've walked for miles into Manhattan and around Brooklyn, letting the 30 degree heat and sun dance on my skin and fill me with what can I only describe as complete and utter contentment.
This is the absolute best thing I have ever done. I think about my life right now and my stomach flips and it's an overwhelming feeling of joy. All I can do is share my experience and hope that I can influence people to go out and do things they usually wouldn't. Take a risk and don't worry about the negative, because if I had pursued only the thoughts of what could have gone wrong I would have never found myself here and wouldn't be giving myself the chances and opportunities I have driven myself for. I genuinely think this is the happiest I have ever been in my life, and as a past sufferer of depression, boy I can't tell you how great that is.
Forever the most cheesiest.
G x
Tuesday 22 March 2016
Dating in London
Dating in London. A myth? A joke? Non-existent perhaps? Yes of course I'm exaggerating, it does happen and maybe this is only from personal experience but it's kind of a drag. I find that rather odd, living in this beautiful city amongst 8 million fellow human beings that I was unable to find at least ONE person that is on the same level as me.
I refuse to use tinder. I've tried the app before out of curiosity and could never get past the talking to the actual 'date' part. I don't want to meet someone on a dating app and I don't want to meet someone over the internet. I want a very specific human being that fits perfectly into my messy life at exactly the right time. This is not an easy achievement. Le sigh.
I think the whole dating in London thing is hard because firstly we're a big old ignorant bunch. If anyone tried to approach me on the street I'd avert eye contact at all costs. Sometimes I have my headphones in without any music playing just so I don't have to talk to people. (God I am terrible)
Secondly, the underground makes it hard for me to find love. Let me tell you now, if I've been shooting in Ealing Broadway all day and have spent a good 2 hours of my day on public transport, the last thing I want to do is meet you across London in Camden only to have to catch the last 40 minute tube home back to south east. WHAT I WANT IS TO SLOB IN BED WATCHING CLUELESS DO NOT JUDGE ME.
I spent the majority of last year trying to forget about a guy I had been seeing at the beginning of the year. It was one of those 'lead you on' types, and instead of having the bottle to call him out on his BS, I just slowly managed to fade him out of my life. Which is fine on the outside look of things, but now looking back I wish I'd just told him he was a prick and saved myself the silent heartache. But again this person doesn't count - he didn't even live in London.
I have a great habit of getting involved with people that live absolutely no where near me. I mean, I almost bought flights to Canada last November on a whim. I think I like the hopeless romantic long distance feeling of missing someone. I'm in love with the idea of falling in love on an adventure I guess. But just with the idea of it. The reality of it is, I'm too fussy, too busy, too independent. It's not that I don't want to be with someone, it's just that it has to be exactly the right person, someone that makes me feel like a relationship is a bonus and not a hold back. Someone that wants to travel but with their career and somehow that all being able to happen together.
How is any of that possible? Timing has so much to do with it all. I do not fall very easily at all but the very few times that I have since living in London, it's fallen through because it wasn't what the other person wanted. I think mostly that's because they were a little bit douchebaggy though. (yes - douchebaggy).
It's not that I don't get attention from people, I've casually dated and enjoyed the social aspect of it. That's great, it's all fun you know. But I look at my friends in relationships and think 'wait, how'd you get that?' I don't think it's anything that I am doing wrong, nor that it's a bad thing that I am single, in fact I think it's my own doing that I haven't pursued a relationship. I put things in place unconsciously that make it difficult to pursue one i.e living in New York this summer. When I think about that, I'm like - I definitely am 100 percent doing my own thing and taking every opportunity to live my life as fully as possible. I guess it would just be cool to have someone that was as weird and happy and caring on the same level.
X
I refuse to use tinder. I've tried the app before out of curiosity and could never get past the talking to the actual 'date' part. I don't want to meet someone on a dating app and I don't want to meet someone over the internet. I want a very specific human being that fits perfectly into my messy life at exactly the right time. This is not an easy achievement. Le sigh.
I think the whole dating in London thing is hard because firstly we're a big old ignorant bunch. If anyone tried to approach me on the street I'd avert eye contact at all costs. Sometimes I have my headphones in without any music playing just so I don't have to talk to people. (God I am terrible)
Secondly, the underground makes it hard for me to find love. Let me tell you now, if I've been shooting in Ealing Broadway all day and have spent a good 2 hours of my day on public transport, the last thing I want to do is meet you across London in Camden only to have to catch the last 40 minute tube home back to south east. WHAT I WANT IS TO SLOB IN BED WATCHING CLUELESS DO NOT JUDGE ME.
I spent the majority of last year trying to forget about a guy I had been seeing at the beginning of the year. It was one of those 'lead you on' types, and instead of having the bottle to call him out on his BS, I just slowly managed to fade him out of my life. Which is fine on the outside look of things, but now looking back I wish I'd just told him he was a prick and saved myself the silent heartache. But again this person doesn't count - he didn't even live in London.
I have a great habit of getting involved with people that live absolutely no where near me. I mean, I almost bought flights to Canada last November on a whim. I think I like the hopeless romantic long distance feeling of missing someone. I'm in love with the idea of falling in love on an adventure I guess. But just with the idea of it. The reality of it is, I'm too fussy, too busy, too independent. It's not that I don't want to be with someone, it's just that it has to be exactly the right person, someone that makes me feel like a relationship is a bonus and not a hold back. Someone that wants to travel but with their career and somehow that all being able to happen together.
How is any of that possible? Timing has so much to do with it all. I do not fall very easily at all but the very few times that I have since living in London, it's fallen through because it wasn't what the other person wanted. I think mostly that's because they were a little bit douchebaggy though. (yes - douchebaggy).
It's not that I don't get attention from people, I've casually dated and enjoyed the social aspect of it. That's great, it's all fun you know. But I look at my friends in relationships and think 'wait, how'd you get that?' I don't think it's anything that I am doing wrong, nor that it's a bad thing that I am single, in fact I think it's my own doing that I haven't pursued a relationship. I put things in place unconsciously that make it difficult to pursue one i.e living in New York this summer. When I think about that, I'm like - I definitely am 100 percent doing my own thing and taking every opportunity to live my life as fully as possible. I guess it would just be cool to have someone that was as weird and happy and caring on the same level.
X
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)