New York, New York

I had the idea last summer. It crept into my brain one night after spending a couple of weeks in Los Angeles and realising I crave the sun on my skin and but also the fast pace of my home city. It was just an idea. I booked flights in November last year. An impulse decision and fuelled by the spontaneity of it all. It probably wouldn't happen though, and what's £350 wasted anyway? I started telling people pretty soon after that, and when you tell people you have to do it. There's no point in saying you're going to do something unless you can carry out the intention. I found a place to stay and paid my rent up front, and even still at that point, something in my head was telling me it still wasn't real, and then all of a sudden I'm at JFK New York airport and it hits me that I'm about to spend the next three months living here. I actually did it.

Some people back home didn't get why I was leaving for so long, "but what are you going to do Gemma?" Three months is a long time. I've had a drive in me for as long as I can remember and I like to think it's what has fuelled my career and ambition. I knew I could make contacts out here. But predominantly I wanted to have a living experience. After finally feeling settled in London after over two years and feeling in the best possible place with life and work, it was time to yank myself out of my comfort zone and take it one step bigger. So this is my summer to meet as many people as possible and find as much beauty in this city as possible. If I like it, I'm going to self fund an 0-1 visa and hopefully move and work here in the long run.

I've been here for 5 days and I couldn't even imagine the things I have done since I got here. I thought as I struggled with London at the start, that I'd feel a bit out of depth here. However, my first day here I was asked to shoot in Philadelphia the following week, I ended up dog sitting for Robert Pattinson from twilight, drank in biker bars and played "dare Jenga" with a bunch of random people - resulting in me having to lunge twice around the bar and repeatedly doing the chicken dance.  I've walked for miles into Manhattan and around Brooklyn, letting the 30 degree heat and sun dance on my skin and fill me with what can I only describe as complete and utter contentment.

This is the absolute best thing I have ever done. I think about my life right now and my stomach flips and it's an overwhelming feeling of joy. All I can do is share my experience and hope that I can influence people to go out and do things they usually wouldn't. Take a risk and don't worry about the negative, because if I had pursued only the thoughts of what could have gone wrong I would have never found myself here and wouldn't be giving myself the chances and opportunities I have driven myself for. I genuinely think this is the happiest I have ever been in my life, and as a past sufferer of depression, boy I can't tell you how great that is.

Forever the most cheesiest.

G x